We've started a new feature here at Always Sometimes Anytime. Borne from a continual email thread between myself and Hannah Cooke with links recounting hilarious celebrity faux pas or new online memes, we decided this hilarity was better shared. Hannah has taken up the challenge of curating a weekly spot of her favourite celebrity and online occurances, and the first is below for your reading pleasure. Happy weekend!
In totally unsurprising news to those of us who care passionately about lemurs, a group of red ruffed ones with psychic gifts sensed the Washington earthquake and began making signals to each other about it FIFTEEN minutes before the shaking started, as opposed to pandas who didn't feel anything .
Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith broke up, but then they didn’t actually, and none of us really cared. I kind of care about the fact that Will’s son Trey, whose tweet silenced all separation rumours, is kind of a babe now.
Footage of FASSBENDER in drag on a bed with James MacAvoy has been released and for some reason, no one but me cares. It's fantastic! FASSBENDER!!!111!!
Meanwhile, Anderson Cooper giggled adorably.
Kimberley Stewart and Benicio Del Toro had a baby. The little bundle of joy is named Delilah, as in “Why why whyyyyy? Delilah!!” I think I speak for all of the Always Sometimes Anytime team when I say that we eagerly await Rod Stewart’s (presumably) upcoming release of the classic tune. Grandpa Stewart’s ex wife, “our” Rachel Hunter, went to the hospital to visit the newborn, which is rather sweet. Also sweet? Tip Top Trumpets. Sweeter still? Magnum Gold?!’s. Lucky Delilah will get ALL the ice cream.
Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom were spotted “house hunting” in New Zealand. They’re just looking for a rental property, and will by now no doubt be discovering the joys of trying to find a decent, reasonably priced, insulated house in New Zealand during the Rugby World Cup. Snort! On the plus side, New Zealand’s collective aesthetic appeal will probably increase by 70% if they move here, which I guess is a good thing? I don’t even know any more. It’s all such drivel.
While on the topic of the celebrity influx to Wellywood, I have to say that I really enjoy the way that when you put a pile of internationally famous actors into a city as small as Wellington, everybody gets to meet them! Or, at least, see them in bars and cafes all the time. The city is so teensy that you’re constantly bumping into people, famous or no. Of course, because it’s Wellington, everybody just plays it cool, like it’s no biggie that you just saw Adrian Brody walking down Manners Street in a white tracksuit carrying a Chihuahua (happened to me) or that Ian McKellen is sitting directly opposite you in the bar where you had your first herbal high experience (also happened to me). But it is a big deal.
Ryan Gosling "squashed a beef" and a hilarious new meme was born! If there’s one thing we all know for sure, it’s that “too much of a good thing” does not apply to Gosling memes.
I am vaguely upset by the Kardashian wedding.
Miley Cyrus' neck-tattooed brother (google image search at your own risk) has apparently planted the Cyrus-seed in The Social Network’s Brenda Song. Neck tattoos are a deal breaker for me, but different strokes (ew) for different folks.
Alicia Silverstone and Paul Rudd reunion!!
In other Paul Rudd news, read this.
I find the way that the media has jumped onto little Bobby Draper’s quote about January Jones depressing. People always rag on January Jones’ skills and personality but I think maybe she’s a really good actor. Perhaps they think that she’s so perfect in the part that it’s impossible for her to be acting and therefore must be an icy repressed cow in real life. Not fair! On the other hand, these imaginary conversations between January and little Bobby are Very Good Indeed. Besides, everybody (apart, possibly, from Ryan Gosling) loses when they’re in direct competition with Jon Hamm for affection (see above). To summarise: I am flip flopping on the topic of January Jones’ talent and friendliness.
These pictures of Dan Humphrey as my high school boyfriend make me feel sad inside.
My favourite 85 year old Spanish Duchess, the Duchess of Alba, is on the verge of wedding her 60 year old lover, Alfonso Diez. Congratulations to the happy couple! The Duchess of Alba is very interesting and I highly recommend reading about her on the internet.